The Ten Commandments of an Easter Hangover

Leila Halley-Wright

With Easter just behind us, Rumpus thought it fitting to grace our beloved readers with one last wholesome post before Yale descends into the chaos of backstabbing, social climbing, and failed hookups that inevitably accompanies the release of 50 Most. We would have posted this yesterday, but we were too busy failing spectacularly at #'s 1, 2, 6, and, duh, 10. Giving up Long Island Iced Teas for lent is a lot harder than it sounds. 

1. Thou shalt not wake up in Yale Health on Easter Sunday

2. Thou shalt not show up to church still drunk

3. Thou shalt not take the name of thy LORD Cupcakke in vain

4. Remember the Sabbath day is for the boys

5. Thou shall murder a Gheav bacon, egg, and cheese

6. Thou shalt not commit adultery before sexiling thy roommate

7. Thou shall drink away the stress of thy exams

8. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy religious neighbor’s DFMO

9. Thou shalt not covet a trip to Soads

10. Honor thy liver in preparation for the 50 Most launch party on Wednesday